Thoughts on Creative Self-Sufficiency
A brutally honest reflection on mental illness, shame, family judgment and the exhausting work of finding a way back from the darkness. Sometimes writing is how we drag the demons into the light. And sometimes survival begins with two simple words: I matter.
# Main-Page Summary
What happens when you stop listening to “They” and start listening to yourself? At almost 50, I’m rebuilding my life around dreams I once allowed fear, doubt, and other people’s opinions to bury. I’m finishing my library qualification, buying a coastal property, planning a steel-frame home, and preparing for a future filled with writing, blogging, travel, and rather ambitious adventures. There will be sacrifices, mistakes, terrifying beginnings, and probably an alarming quantity of energy drinks. But there will also be an e-trike journey across America, books, perhaps a boat and ocean crossings, and ten years of deliberately choosing the life I actually want.
Life is rather hectic: I’m juggling six UNISA modules, getting plans drawn up for my future Koingnaas home, and figuring out how to fund the build. I’m also considering documenting the whole adventure on YouTube. It’s an ambitious couple of years, but I’ve never been particularly good at choosing easy options.
I recently upgraded my computer setup and can finally post more often. After years of searching, I’ve made an offer on affordable land in Koingnaas on the West Coast of South Africa—an ideal spot for self-sufficient living, clean air, and stargazing. While waiting for the seller to settle municipal debt and for the deeds office to finalize transfer, I’m tackling my own debt using the Debt Snowball method and exploring extra income streams. My long-term goals include building an off-grid home, using wind and fog catchers for water and energy, studying to become a librarian, and writing my next novel.
Aspiring “gran-influencer” plans to sail the world, blog, vlog, and embrace a bold oceanic adventure! ⛵
Every story needs a beginning if only to provide context and a bit of method to the madness. My story started on 15 January 2004, the day of my second birth. I’m not going to dwell on the details. Suffice it to say that I accidentally realized many things I never noticed before. And one…
I parted ways with my legal representative in Ukraine this week. Yes, he’s a great guy and we’ll probably always be friends, but professionally, I don’t think we’d be seeing each other again. It wasn’t a drawn-out fight. It was more of a fizzle when we both realized we weren’t what the other needed. Sometimes…
Over the past ten years, I have made serious judgment errors. And one of them cost me almost my entire gemstone collection, none of which I can replace. A few weeks ago, I decided to start rebuilding a collection, slowly but surely. I won’t get the same gemstones or deals, but I’m also not the…
Life is all about making choices, and then living with the consequence of those choices. Some of those choices are easy and some are not. And then there are choices that you simply can’t make! Right now, I am at one of those decision points. On the one hand, I have my family, friends, career,…
I teach self-reliance, the world’s most subversive practice. I teach people how to grow their own food, which is shockingly subversive. So, yes, it’s seditious. But it’s peaceful sedition.Bill Mollison When I first heard these words, spoken by David Holmgren, I had to look up the word “sedition.” Even as a person fluent in English,…